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Thursday, May 22, 2008

Women Empowering Women


One of my wonderful coaches, Tammy, emailed me this evening with some of her personal thoughts. She was simply writing to get "things" off her chest...no intention of posting it, but I was very touched by what I read and amazed at her candor. With her permission, I am posting her email here:

Thoughts:
Ok so I am thinking... what do I see here? I lurked, I joined and I felt like a family, all different colors, shapes sizes and nationality of women encouraging each other to do great things. I work in Financial Corporate America and I can say wow I have seen some really mess up things that women do to each other. I usually keep to my self... I am always constantly looking within: Can I be better at something? How can I be a better person? Am I perfect? LOL errrm NO! Though many days I try to be superwoman, it just doesn't happen! I fall shorter than short! I have learned and am continuing to learn to look within my self and remember that change is good. There should always is a time for retrospection.

Coming out better:
I have found that in life that we are forced to undergo changes MOSTLY due to some minor or major trauma or difficulty; some come out better and unfortunately some regress.

For the most part when we come out better we find ourselves functioning at higher threshold... We suddenly realize can DEAL with things we never thought possible - DO things we never thought possible! AND amazingly are STRONGER for it! I have come to the realization though that you don't have to go thru huge difficulties in order to change or be stronger… I could prob go on for pages but I guess you get my drift...

Let me make 2 examples of what I mean by surpassing thresholds and being stuck at one:

Surpassing: You go thru something, you learn from it, you grow, you move forward, you don’t do it the same way you did in the past. Stuck: Something happened to you, say when you were 17 and if affected you in a traumatic way, suddenly you find your self in a similar position today, or what seems like a similar situation and you over react because it feels so darn familiar and horrible and it just grinds your guts to think about it and suddenly you are reacting as if its happening all over again. Sounds familiar? Then your threshold to move on from such a situation is stuck! Arghh hope that makes sense!

The Thread
You know, finding the thread, I felt a connection to so many women here... I read the stories, they are funny, they are frustrating, they are venting, and they are encouraging... All in all a place you felt heard and, at the very same time, not judged. A place where not just coaches, but people typing up response posts faster than you can press refresh! I have seen MOSTLY success stories and a few who just disappeared along the way... I find my self wondering, what happened that one or this one?? I know we all came here with the same thoughts... How can I get slim and look good and feel better. But I think for a lot of us, we got something even better... We made friends and connections to people who we have no clue what their voices sound like but we feel close all the same :-). We Lost inches, We Lost Weight, We Lost Fat! We Lost Bad Habits!

I want to be very clear and keep short this next sentence though it has weighed heavily on me these past days. I am not really a confrontational person, but I am moved to share in order to PRESERVE what we have built here. I will ask please that you read and really read. Examine your thoughts and feelings on this matter. Comment and Share if you want to, but this is not a bashing contest nor is it about proving point. I wish I were more eloquent to express and write in a way that is moving. Alas, here goes.... I have seen a few tiffs lately. Exchanges... some shocking and contemptuous; some delivered with sugary insinuation and insidiousness; ideas simulated without the respect of permission. I could go on but will stop here... Because honestly? The good of this place outweighs even these things...

Continue:
Let us continue to give because our hearts demand it... Let us continue to be encouraging because we can. Let us for the time we are here and a member of this community, continue to believe in each other and support each other in whatever program/venture/path we take on.

I don't care if you are religious or not, but something amazing happens when you give without reservation and without expectation in return... Suddenly life seems abundant and one has to wonder why.

I know this, I am grateful to have found it here in this really unlikely place. Let us continue to challenge our selves, find meaning and answers to hardship that life dishes out... TOGETHER.

Battle of the bulge:
OK Zen moment over, LOL, Damn it ladies, BRING IT and Bring it hard with your attitude, with your motivation, with your eating, with your sense of what is right, with EACH OTHER.

After thought:
Look at what I have seen? Look at what WE/lurkers have seen from you all and...

In no particular order, the following... Things I remember, things I appreciated.:

Rochelle: Thank you for being there for me when I had to just let it all loose, I am grateful for your advice, encouragement and that you are stern when you need to be. I see your progress and I aspire to it. I have come to think of you as a dear friend and I am grateful for it.

Indie: Wow, you really are one to follow... you went thru a break up you didn't let it hold you down, you lost weight, you encouraged and you are now a co*ach helping people.

Hope: LOL you are a crazy a$$ hippie and you keep this place alive... I see you though! You give and give even when you are going thru difficulty; you find time for others around you. You inspire change and bring lightness to our hearts.

Donna: You’re sweet and encouraging and thank you for the time you took to draw us personal pictures... We miss you!

Michele: OK I am just going to adopt you LOL... Thank you for being our consistency, for always posting and giving accountability, for being rebellious and real and coming out on top of things and with Success!

Sandy: The super clean eating woman... Girl you an example to follow!!!

Barbie: I didn't get to know you personally but GURLLL your pictures had me amped all the time and it still does LOL if you ever knew how many people I showed and they were like damn doing beach body did that??? Yeppers.. This was your and Ro's brainchild, you guys started this!!!! I am very proud to be a part of what you guys started here.

Cassie: What can I say damn you really inspired us with how well you did on the program

Kristy: Every time I saw the name Ducky I just wanted to CRACK up. I am glad you are back and getting a hold of things again.. Where are you this week?

Brookef & Judy: I remember you guys being so frustrated.. I hope you found success in your other programs!

Jim & Brian: Damn it was just nice to see guys once in a while LOL

Laurie: Well, you are just one lean and fit lady... I kept thinking man she looks great already! But hey that is the idea right? To look good and keep doing your body well! Thank you for your beautiful pictures/photography.

Janet: I have seen you here for ever, our consistent long timer, you encourage and you share with no agenda.. It’s just because! Thank you.. And where are the pics of that cute son?? heh

Silvja: I love it that you are one of those people who did SOOOO well on the program, yet you are still here, you are still PP, you still vent heh but you are in the direction of making this your life.

Marylin: AKA who is Maria?? Girl Damn your results I have to say I remember as being one of the most impressive.. keep it up and lead the way, we are looking to you!

Paula: Where are you these days is your hip ok? Are you published yet? I remember you did really well

Ange: I think you were graduating when first started.. I gotta say wow girl, you got some SERIOUS transformation! I cant believe you did SI6 so many times????

Jo: It was great getting to know you, finally someone who loves coconut oil!

Mrs Johnson: Girl from way around the world and yet you stay up just to sync with us from Asia, you are beautiful and sweet, I cannot wait to see what this journey has given you!

Crissy: Girl you are one of us... We haven’t had many interactions but you do stand out in my mind!

JoJo: Girl you did amazing and you are going to help so many people...lurkers already I am sure! Listen thanks for asking me if it was ok about posting that hydrogenated thing...

Timmy & Patty: Well talk about leading and being lead, and then flip that in reverse! Trouble maker and ring leader, following right in Hope's footsteps might I add! Gotta say though, I see your love and commitment to each other - Sisterhood.. It is what we are trying to emulate here. Thank you!

List To be continued...

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2 comments:

Coach Jen said...

Ro - I love you and you know I do! Without you behind me everyday I dont know how I'd keep going. You've mentored me to become MY OWN INDIVIDUAL UNIQUE coach on the BeachBody threads. I took what you "taught" me and have become "The Slimmin' Mom"!

But..this comment is for Tams:

There is a REASON why you were nominated for Poet of the Year. You have a way with words that I could only dream of. What a touching and HONEST email. I knew I liked you! ;)

Thank you for the "reality check". Let's focus on the fitness! Let's focus on the women (and men) we help everyday. At the end of the day, it's what's important!

Sisterhood is right...EMPOWERMENT! We push it everyday, and we know how true it is when we see the successes of the individuals we coach. What an amazing opportunity BeachBody has given us!!

Love, Jen

Anonymous said...

Thanks Jen, Girl I love you all too. I am glad I could just go there and share what was on my heart.

Ermmm on another note.. Boy did I take up a lot space on your blog Ro. Guys forgive me for the typo here and there, guess I just had to get it out on paper and didn't get a chance stop to check. My imaginary editor would be horrified :-)